Thanks to the Entertainment Weekly 'Summer Movie Preview' issue, I've managed to wrap my head around the behemoth that is the summer movie season. My breakdown of each month's 'Must-See' movies, 'Cautiously Optimistic' movies, and 'Just Say No' movies is actually more for my own benefit than for your blog reading enjoyment, but I'm glad I get to include everyone in my borderline obsessive interest in movies. Here we go...
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~ May ~
Bring on the Three-quels
~ June ~
Comedy, Action, and Drama, Oh My
~ August ~
All Good Summers Must Come To An End
Bring on the Three-quels
Must-See:
- Spider-Man 3......Sure, the critics reviews have been mixed, but I think I'll go see a movie that world moviegoers just spent 375 million dollars on in THREE DAYS! [May 4]
28 Weeks Later......I just don't know why but I have this affinity for movies involving zombies (not to be confused with 'zombie movies', which are more campy than realistic). I guess it has something to do with wondering how I'd survive if this were to actually happen...oh, who am I kidding, I'd be infected within the first five minutes. [May 11]
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End......There's no denying, Pirates 2 was not very good story-wise. Then again, most middle movies of a trilogy suffer with a story that, by it's very nature, is in limbo. That being said, I expect a great concluding chapter from what used to be the highest grossing weekend opener ever (Spider-Man 3 has challenged you Pirates 3...the ball's in your ship). [May 25]- Shrek 3......The problem I had with Shrek 2 was that the movie felt like it had become aware of itself, making what amounted to elaborate, but not overly funny, inside-jokes. I'm assuming now that The Office's John Krasinski is part of the cast, everything will be a-OK. [May 18]
- Georgia Rule......If I want to see Lindsey Lohan being "a raucous girl [that] proves too much trouble for her mother", I'll just watch VH1's Best Week Ever, thank you very much. [May 11]
- Lucky You......I've been mocking this movie ever since it's intended release years ago. It's too bad the producers of this film didn't know when to fold'em. [May 4]
~ June ~
Comedy, Action, and Drama, Oh My
Must-See:
Knocked Up......Thanks to an early screening by Mr. Cooper, we already know this will be the comedy hit of the summer. And why wouldn't it be? It involves Seth Rogen and a sex-related storyline. Sold! [June 1]- Live Free or Die Hard......After twelve long years, John McClane is back! I'm not sure anyone was really asking for this, but we're damn happy to receive it. Is there any chance that Jeremy Iron's character will make a cameo? [June 27]
- A Mighty Heart......I think we're looking at our summer Oscar buzz movie, or at least a potential Oscar-worthy performance by Angelina Jolie playing the widow of Daniel Pearl. [June 22]
Cautiously Optimistic:
- Ocean's Thirteen......Yes, they forgot to actually create a coherent storyline for Ocean's Twelve, but I'm willing to forgive. Then again, the "thirteen" addition appears to be actress Ellen Barkin, who I really don't care for very much. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I stop trusting Steven Soderbergh. [June 8]
Evan Almighty......Sequels without the original leading actors don't usually go so well (Dumb and Dumberer anyone?). However, I'm not sure that applies to sequels that have Steve Carell stepping in. God willing (pun intended), this will be the exception to the rule. [June 22]- Sicko......What's with all the secrecy surrounding Michael Moore's newest documentary about the health-care industry? I'm not sure if that's a good sign or a bad sign, but one thing is for sure...everyone's clamoring for more Moore! [June ?]
Just Say No:
- Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer......HBO's Saturday movie premiere night tricked me into seeing the first Fantastic Four. I could have saved a couple of hours and just punched myself in the brain a few times. [June 15]
Surf's Up......Oh look, an animated movie about penguins, and they're surfing this time, wow, how creative...STOP WITH THE PENGUINS! [June 8]- Mr. Brooks......I'm definitely intrigued by a thriller starring Kevin Costner as the killer, especially when the supporting cast includes William Hurt, Demi Moore, and...comedian Dane Cook !? Umm, no thanks. [June 1]
~ July ~
Goodbye Summer Sun, Hello Darkness of Theater Must-See:
The Simpsons Movie......Talk about anticipation. There is so much expectation wrapped around this movie, it may end up being the greatest movie or biggest disappointment of the summer. Either way, you can guarantee I'll be there on opening night. [June 27]- Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix......Quite honestly, I thought the last Harry Potter was just not as good as it should have been (Alfonso Cuaron's Prisoner of Azkaban is the level of excellence by which all future Harry Potter movies should strive to achieve). That being said, Phoenix director David Yates looks like an "off the beaten path" type of director, so hopefully things will be back on track this installment. [July 13]
- Transformers......And, my childhood dreams are fulfilled. With the coveted Independence Day weekend release, I'm predicting a massive opening for a movie that will draw father and son alike. [July 4]
Cautiously Optimistic:
- License to Wed......This looks like it will be a good date movie for me and my fiance, but a Hollywood insider (Mr. Cooper, of course) has been saying the early buzz surrounding this movie is less than good. Then again, the mushy nature of romantic comedies usually results in apathy by reviewers. [July 4]
Hairspray......I haven't seen the Broadway version, but I just can't ignore a movie where John Travolta plays an obese singing woman. [July 20]- Rescue Dawn......A Vietnam POW movie starring Christian Bale...interesting. But Steve Zahn? I'm just not sure. [July 4]
Just Say No:
I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry......It's possible that I'm wrong about this one, but I'm guessing this movie is more 'cheap homophobic bits' funny than "creative social satire' funny. Not to mention, Kevin James is simply awful and Adam Sandler has become a comedic flop-making machine. [July 20]- No Reservations......Catherine Zeta-Jones and Aaron Eckhart in a "romantic drama" about high-end chefs. Wow, I think I just heard the entire movie industry let out a collective yawn. [July 27]
- 1408......Simply put, this movie is about an evil hotel room. So very, very creative. The only thing more cliched than evil hotel rooms are horror movies that are released on Friday the 13th...oh boy. [July 13]
~ August ~
All Good Summers Must Come To An End
Must-See:
The Bourne Ultimatum......With the success of the first and second installments, moviegoers have spoken about their genuine excitement for the Bourne series. Ultimatum will likely prove to be a worthy ending for both the trilogy and the summer movie season as a whole. [August 3]- The Invasion......There is a chance that this movie will not be as good as I think/hope it will be. Still, I just can't see a Body Snatchers remake that attracted Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig being anything less than alien movie fun. [August 17]
Cautiously Optimistic:
Rush Hour 3......Is it possible that this comic duo has simply passed its prime? Yes. Do I want to see Jackie Chan use a fly swatter to take down an army of bad guys and then escape by jumping through a doggy door? Yes and yes. [August 10]- The Brothers Solomon......This is a tough one. On the one hand you have the Arrested Development's Will Arnett and SNL's Will Forte, both of whom are pretty darn funny. On the other hand, Will Forte was also in the movie Beerfest. I think I'll check out the critics on this one. [August 31]
Just Say No:
- Halloween......Nobody asked for this, nobody wants this, and you're not fooling anyone by not attaching a number to the end of this movie. [August 31]
- El Cantante......Note to Jennifer Lopez: stop making movies with your 'flavors of the week'! Actually, just stop making movies. [August 1]
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