Yet Another Way I'm Less Talented Than A Dog

You may have seen Tyson before, he's pretty famous. I first saw him on The Ellen DeGeneres Show a few weeks back, and I was blown away by how genuinely happy he was with skateboarding. If you have yet to seen Tyson in action, I suggest you take a look at this video...

Just Dropping In To Say Hello

There really is nothing better than video of stupid criminals. That being said, this one deserves to be in the Hall of Fame of Stupid Criminals...

One More

Some visual highlights of Rutgers defeating Syracuse at the final home game of our 2006 Scarlet Knights...

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

I've been so busy eating homemade stuffing, I forgot to mention...

Nice Try Cheerios

Cheerios has been heavily marketing their newest creation, a cereal called Fruity Cheerios. Hmmmm, a cereal made up of small, fruity circles...circles that one might even call loop-shaped...I feel like this fruitish, loopy-like cereal is oddly familiar...wait...wait a minute...HEY!

Nice try Cheerios, but I think Fruit Loops beat you to this idea by a few decades or so. AND, I happen to have gotten my hands on some upcoming cereal creations by Cheerios, and they too seem oddly familiar...

• 'Flake-ios'...flake-shaped Cheerios lightly covered in frosted, sugary goodness!

• 'Count Cheerio's Chocolate Cheerios'...they're chocolate, they're marshmallow, they're Cheerios!

• 'Lucky Cheerios'...they're always after me Lucky Cheerios!

Saturday Night At The Movies...And Sunday Night, Monday Night, Tuesday Night...

Damn my local theater for having 24 screens! There are just TOO many movies out right now! Here's the rundown...

~Movies I Need to See ASAP~

• Babel
• Casino Royale
  

~Movies I Will Hopefully See Soon~

• Fast Food Nation
• Flags of Our Fathers
• The Prestige
• The Queen

~Movies I'll Wait To See on DVD~

• Marie Antoinette
• Running With Scissors
• Stranger Than Fiction

Top Of The Line

My plan was genius. The opportunity to reserve one of the six Playstation 3 systems being shipped to local Electronics Boutique and Gamestop stores had come and gone, and I was only a few hours too late. But, my new plan would surely work...

Best Buy!!! But, is Best Buy even receiving any Playstation 3 units, I pondered? Yes they are! According to their website, each store will be selling 25 units on November 17th, the official release date of the Playstation 3. The website continued on by stating that the first 25 people in line at 8AM on Friday would be able to purchase one system.

"Perfect", I thought. I'll arrive around 6AM, be one of the first people in line, spend $600 on a Playstation 3, and then turn around and sell it on eBay for 3 times as much! My plan was flawless...until...

I decided to take a ride to my local Best Buy. I figured I'd chat with a sales clerk, try and get some insider info into the release date procedure...but before I could even enter the store, I was confronted by an extremely disappointing site. People...in line...waiting...outside of the store...waiting to purchase a Playstation 3...THREE DAYS BEFORE THE RELEASE DATE!!! Upon entering the store, I wearily approached the nearest sales clerk and asked "Tell me that's not what I think it is.", to which he replied "Yep...Playstation 3." I was floored. It turns out these 30 or so people standing outside of the Best Buy had been there since the day before, prepared with chairs, sleeping equipment, food, etc. The clerk continued on by explaining how the same thing had occurred a year ago during the release of the X-Box 360, and 5 years ago during the release of the Playstation 2 (only in those years, the initial U.S. release numbers for those systems were in the millions, rather than in the hundreds of thousands).

Listen, I have nothing against waiting in lines for long periods of time to get highly anticipated goods and services. I myself once waiting for over 6 hours outside (and eventually inside) of a Sam's Club to have a freshly purchased copy of My Life signed by Former President Bill Clinton (by the way, he's taller than I expected...then again, most people are when you're 5'5" tall). However, if someone came up to me on the street and said "Hey, I can guarantee you a Playstation 3 system on release date, that you'll be able to sell on eBay and make a thousand dollars or so, and all YOU have to do is drive to Best Buy and live outside of the store entrance for 4 days...what do you think!?", I'd look them straight in the eyes and say..."Your car or mine?"

Trailer Trash...And More!

Now that election season is over, it's time to get back to what really matters: obsessing over movies and television. Read on...

• I guess you have to take the good with the bad. This past week, two highly-anticipated trailers premiered for two highly-anticipated movies: Spider-Man 3 and The Simpsons Movie. The Spider-Man 3 trailer (which can be found at ifilm.com) was exciting, and showcases just how chaotic this third installment is going to be. On the other hand, The Simpsons Movie trailer (which can be found here) is just plain awful. I expect a "world premiere" trailer to be funny and/or provide some insight into the general plot of the movie...this achieved neither. I expected better from you, Mr. Groening.

• I have to say, I have never seen acting so poor as the acting in this clip of Law & Order. And, the acting is done by none other than (no surprise here) Chevy Chase! On a recent episode of Law & Order, Chevy Chase plays a washed up, drunk, abusive actor that goes crazy when he is pulled over...sound like any celebrities we know? It's clear they wanted to achieve that "ripped from the headlines" feeling, but this is just laughable.

• If you're like me or Mr. Cooper, you've already spent countless hours watching dozens of Borat clips on YouTube...BUT, have you seen this interview that Sacha Baron Cohen did with David Letterman as himself? Even though it's from a few years ago, this is one of the rare occurrences where Cohen has done an interview as himself. It's great to see how well-mannered the man being the racist, sexist, perverted Kazakhstani journalist really is.

Best Week Ever

This week...the Democrats retook control of both houses in the United States Congress, and now hold the Governorships in 28 states.

This week...the Rutgers football team defeated Louisville in one of the greatest victories in the history of college football, and is now ranked 6th in the BCS standings.

This week...Britney Spears filed for divorce from Kevin Federline, effectively halting production of Britney and Kevin's legion of "super-trash babies".

This week...was the Best Week Ever.

A Knight To Remember

Words cannot do justice to the history-making event that was the Rutgers v. Louisville football game of November 9th, 2006. These pictures and videos, however, help to send you back to that amazing night when all eyes were on the Scarlet Knights...

The People Have Spoken

Well, there you have it. Once again, the Republicans will maintain control of both the House and the Sen...wait...wait a minute...oh boy...oh my god...OH MY GOD! AHHHHH!! FINALLY!!! "YESSSSSS!!! THEY DID IT!!!

*** THE DEMOCRATS HAVE RETAKEN CONTROL OF CONGRESS ***

I channel my inner Borat for this occasion...WA WA WEE WA! It was an amazing election night for the Democrats, and both Mr. Cooper and I were there every step of the way...in front of our televisions, of course.

Let's see how successful my predictions were from my earlier post:

• Jon Kyl in Arizona...check
• Joe Lieberman in Connecticut...check
• Bill Nelson in Florida...check (big surprise, a disabled monkey throwing his own feces at voters would have beaten Katherine Harris)
• Ben Cardin in Maryland...check
• Jon Tester in Montana...check
• Claire McCaskill in Missouri...check
• Robert Menendez in New Jersey...check
• Sherrod Brown in Ohio...check
• Robert Casey in Pennsylvania...check
• Sheldon Whitehouse in Rhode Island...check
• Bob Corker in Tennessee...unfortunately for Harold Ford, check
• And finally, I barely chose George Allen in Virginia...and I'm so damn happy I was wrong! Pending a magic box full of 7,000 Allen votes being misplaced in Virginia, Jim Webb will be the 6th and final Democratic seat gain necessary to control the Senate!

So, 11 out of 12 predictions correct...pretty good (especially considering the Webb-Allen race is less than a 0.5% difference). I simply cannot express how excited I am for the newly elected Democrat House and Senate, and I sincerely hope they aim high with their ambitions over the next couple of years, keeping in mind the needs of all Americans, but especially those Americans most in need.

In closing, I leave you with various observations - some amusing, some amazing - that I made during the course of this election season...

• Number of hours after the polls closed on the East Coast before we knew the results of senate seats in Ohio, Connecticut, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Maryland, and Pennsylvania: 3
  
• Number of hours after the polls closed in Montana before we knew the results of the Montana senate seat: 14

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• Number of racial groups you need to offend to barely lose a senate election in Virginia: 2

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• Number of races in the House and Senate combined that Democratic challengers won against Republican incumbents: 26
  
• Number of races in the House and Senate combined that Republican challengers won against Democratic incumbents: 0

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• Number of re-elected Governors that have spoken the phrases "rubber-baby-buggy-bumpers", "I don't care who does what to your Hershey highway", and "I'm a cop you idiot": the one and only 'Governator'

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• Number of times the phrase "too close to call" was uttered on MSNBC, CNN, and Fox News election night: 22...thousand

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• Number of eggs on Karl Rove's face: a dozen for each lost Republican race

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• Number of total hours of televised election day coverage I watched: 16

November 7th, 2006

Countdown To Election Day

Here we are, less than 24 hours until election day, and the American public is abuzz with a veritable cornucopia of news stories: President Bush claims Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are doing "an excellent job", the outing of a gay drug-using evangelical leader that earned a living bashing gays, Saddam Hussein sentenced to death by hanging, the release of the sequel to John Kerry's 2004 Presidential race entitled John Kerry: Re-Swifted, the call from all four branches of the military media for President Bush to fire Donald Rumsfeld, allegations that President Bartlett has been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis...wait, that last one was from The West Wing, cross it off.

Analysis of all House, Senate, and Gubernatorial races of the 2006 midterm elections have kept the political punditry on their toes. The New York Times has prepared an interactive elections site that is one of the most comprehensive, user-friendly sites out there.

Based on the election coverage I've been following, there appears to be consensus on the following points:

• Democrats will most likely retake control of the House...whether it's by a small margin or a tidal wave of seat changes has yet to be determined.

• Democrats have a chance of gaining the majority in the Senate...however, the most recent polls are showing that the window of opportunity may be closing for the Democrats, making a 50D-50R Senate or a 49D-51R Senate likely alternatives.

• Democrats will end up with a majority of Governorships across the country...this may not seem important, but this can greatly impact the Presidential campaigns of 2008.

Considering how I've basically plugged the MSNBC election feed coverage directly into my brain for the past two weeks, I've decided to take a stab at calling some of these elections on my own.

Below are 12 Senate races to watch on election night (actually, for a couple of them it's pretty clear who the winner will be, but I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to mock a few choice politicians). Of course, there is one stipulation in my predictions: if I'm wrong on any of these predictions, I'll happily hide behind the following purposefully ambiguous statement...That's politics!

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• Arizona Senate Race --> Jim Pederson(D) v. Jon Kyl(R)...I actually don't know much about this race, but over the past day or so the pundits have discussed an outside chance of Pederson surprising in this race. Based on the polling, I'm skeptical but I certainly wouldn't mind being proven wrong.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Jon Kyl]

• Connecticut Senate Race --> Ned Lamont(D) v. Alan Schlesinger(R) v. Joe Lieberman(I)...After the Democratic primary, it looked like Lamont had done the unthinkable and booted Lieberman, a highly respected yet overly-hawkish Bush-kisser, from the Senate; looks like Lieberman will have the last laugh by actually winning the seat as an Independent (who BETTER caucus with the Democrats like he promised...no funny business Senator!). By the way, is there any way to nominate Alan Schlesinger for the 'Sorriest Republican Senatorial Candidate' Award?
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Joe Lieberman]

• Florida Senate Race--> Bill Nelson(D) v. Katherine Harris(R)...Wow, just wow. I guess you have to give Harris credit for being "optimistic" when she's trailing in the polls by more than 30 points. Then again, if you're the Republican leadership, optimism is the last thing on your mind while you have visions of strangling Harris for entering this Senate race in the first place (not to mention the House seat Harris left to pursue the Senate, which will most likely get picked up by the Democrats).
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Bill Nelson]

• Maryland Senate Race--> Ben Cardin(D) v. Michael Steele(R)...This is much closer than it should be for a Maryland Senatorial Race involving a Republican candidate that is very much a traditional conservative Republican (some say it's because he's running a great campaign...I say it's because he's purposefully never once mentioned on his website or in any of his speeches that he's a Republican, AND he's printed bumper stickers that say "Steele: Democrat"). Still, this is Maryland and I think a lukewarm Cardin will retain the edge.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Ben Cardin]

• Montana Senate Race--> Jon Tester(D) v. Conrad Burns(R)...One of several Senate seats in a statistical tie, this is a difficult race to call. I'm going to assume that the anti-Republican sentiment sweeping the nation will be enough to keep some voters that would have voted for Burns away from the polls. Plus, I'd give anything to see Tester speak in the Senate chamber with his Full Metal Jacket-inspired haircut.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Jon Tester]

• Missouri Senate Race-->Claire McCaskill(D) v. Jim Talent(R)...In my opinion, this is the most difficult race to call out of all of the Senate races. It has been a statistical tie for quite some time, and I almost want to chicken out and say "too close to call"...but I won't. A part of me sees the Michael J. Fox stem cell research advertisement saga as a benefit to McCaskill, but then again I don't know that the national sentiment will match the local sentiment. What I do know is that Missouri is supposed to be a micro-representation of our national political climate so, assuming that's true, the climate is currently cold to the Republican Party. But this is really anyone's race.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Claire McCaskill]

• New Jersey Senate Race--> Robert Menendez(D) v. Thomas Kean, Jr.(R)...This race is the definition of 'ugly politics', abundant in ethical federal investigations and negative attack ads that would make Karl Rove wince (in actuality, Rove is smiling in delight over the chance to take this Senate seat from the Democrats). The polls may be closer than expected, and the Kean name may be big in NJ politics, but New Jersey is the unofficial headquarters for anti-Bush/anti-Iraq War sentiments. I just don't see how Menendez loses this seat, even though he is, at best, a weak candidate.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Robert Menendez]

• Ohio Senate Race--> Sherrod Brown (D) v. Mike Dewine(R)...Dewine has been hit hard by the anti-Republican force in this election season (plus, the economic woes of Ohio certainly aren't helping). At this point, it's pretty clear that Brown has a good grip on this race...he also has an extremely unique first name.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Sherrod Brown]
  

• Pennsylvania Senate Race--> Robert Casey(D) v. Rick Santorum(R)...Can you say "huge loss for the Republicans"? Santorum has been so busy trying to find those non-existent WMD's over in Iraq, his seat got stolen right from under his nose by Casey. The only way Santorum can win this race is if Robert Casey is actually Osama Bin Laden in disguise. And, even then...
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Robert Casey]

• Rhode Island Senate Race--> Sheldon Whitehouse(D) v. Lincoln Chafee(R)...It's the battle of the WASPS! Unfortunately for Democrats, Chafee is a household name in Rhode Island thanks to the legacy of his father. Chafee has managed to close the gap in the past few days but, just like with the other close Senate races, this just isn't a good year to be a Republican.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Sheldon Whitehouse]

• Tennessee Senate Race--> Harold Ford(D) v. Bob Corker(R)...Harold Ford had a shot as the first African American Tennessee Senator since the reconstruction era, but a controversial ad involving a half-naked Caucasian woman whispering "Harold...call me" and some confrontational moments between Ford and Corker has unfortunately given Corker the edge he'll need to win this race.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: Bob Corker]

• Virginia Senate Race--> Jim Webb(D) v. George Allen(R)...Let's all thank Allen for introducing the word 'macaca' to the English lexicon. In a nut shell, this election has been a disaster for Allen, a once-strong candidate for the 2008 Republican Presidential nominee. This race is a statistical tie, and I'd love to give the edge to Webb, but for some reason I expect Allen, the candidate that tried to hide the fact that he had Jewish ancestry, to end up winning with Virginia voters.
  [PREDICTED WINNER: George Allen]

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